The weirdest transgender EVAR!

Nobody · Moderator

The weirdest transgender EVAR!

Raine · Character Inspiration

well you certainly haven't had an easy road..but then, an easy road breeds little character. I know what you mean about going through depression and rejection; at least on a level. mine, as well as Taiki's, coming-out wasn't exactly easy, either. keep us posted and keep your chin up, hey? ^-^

(thank the gods for good people to help you through your trials.)

Nobody · Moderator

Living at home and depending on my parents to get me through school and giving me a place to live certainly makes the situation more complicated, too. If I tell them and they throw me out, I wouldn't have anywhere to go.

Phoenix6901 · Newbie

You've had a rough road so far. I have a very good friend who is going through the exact same as you. She tried so hard for so long to just be a boy, but it didn't work. We almost lost her as a resulted. But once she discovered who and what she was, she is on the road to recovery.

And I support her in every step. There are people out there who can help, maybe if you can afford it, you can see a gender therapist, to better understand and learn some new coping methods. If needed.

I hope things will go more smoothly for you, and that when you tell your parents, that they will support you, and not throw you out. Good luck with it.

Nobody · Moderator

I doubt they will. I'm of a very religious family. So yeah, it'll probably rough when I come out, which is why I don't plan on doing it until I'm out on my own.

3ssay · Lurker

Ahh religion... If humanity has a bigger crutch I have yet to see it.

Oh well... Now, normally would bother you about your religious beliefs, and everything that is wrong with them, but I'll back off, for now. Still, I really hope you would just jump off this crutch because after living as a Christian for the first 18 years of my life, I acknowledged that Christianity is bull****, and all that crutch did was weigh down my soul.

What would advise you and your friend to do is ~~dump your flawed beliefs~~ talk to a official of the United Church of Christ or read over the GLBT section of their website. Find out more so you can get this issue resolved.

Anyway, that's my censored two cents worth. Shrug.

--

How did your friend help you to come to terms with this anyway?

Nobody · Moderator

I could also give you a long, boring lecture that you won't listen to, but I won't.

When it comes to God, he helped me get out of my depression by giving me strength. My friend helped me realize that being a transgender isn't a bad thing. By helping her with her own difficulties with her sexuality, I gained wisdom myself.

Religion is only bad when people use it as an excuse to go to war, hate someone or a group of people, etc. These things, however, are not caused by religion itself. It's caused by people. These people would fight and hurt other people even if religion didn't exist. Like I said, they only use it as an excuse. Religion itself isn't bad.

I have been interested in UCC; however, the nearest church is quite a drive. Besides, I'll be moving to Toronto within a year. It doesn't look like there are any churches in Canada.

3ssay · Lurker

I'm not talking about joining the church, I'm talking about talking them to find the other side of the argument. Spend an hour or two and find out what they believe.

--

BTW, are you planning on freezing your sperm?

Nobody · Moderator

Other side of the argument? What argument?

And that's a bit personal. I'm not going to answer that, sorry.

3ssay · Lurker

Other side of the argument? What argument?
The "is homosexuality a immoral or amoral?" argument, or rather debate. It seems that while both you and your friend have realized you are lesbians, is seems you are still dealing with the contradictions between your feelings and your beliefs.

Personally I find this whole debate pointless. Morality, like religion, is another faulty tool from are archaic lineage. We need only secular law to punish our actions, and an open practise of empathy and humility to guide them.

And that's a bit personal. I'm not going to answer that, sorry.
Heh, didn't strike me as "personal". I was just wondering if you had thought of it yet. Seems like like the logical thing to do if your desire to procreate supercedes the need to enhance the species.

-- Edited by 3ssay at 09:50, 2007-08-25

Nobody · Moderator

I said "what argument" because, last time I checked, I wasn't arguing about anything.

And the question was personal. Sex and procreation, as you put it, are very personal. Besides, it's not my decision to make alone. That a decision for both myself and my partner. It's also a joint decision of disclosure. I wouldn't disrespect her by saying something we haven't yet decided on. Family life in any form is personal. If you really think it isn't, I'm not sure what kind of home you were raised in...

Listen, I'm a person--shocking right? I have feelings. My secrets or my private thoughts are not up for disclosure just because you want them to be.

I don't write out posts like these very often and I don't like to. So please, next time you ask someone something like that, use your head, kid. Please. It'll save everyone a lot of time.

Sora · Senior Member

=] My friend is also a lesbian in a man's body. She's soooooo awesome and rad; I love her.

What really ticks me off is when other people in the LGB community down transgenders, especially when they claim to be a gay man in a woman's body or visa versa. Uhg.

Oh! Speaking of which (A bit off topic,) have you ever read Venus Envy?

Kori · Active Member

im a closet transgender to But i dont plan on the operation... its not as efective as one migh hope as I'll never have periods, babies orm real femeale hormones.. I'll just have the soul of a girl the aperence to mach but the butchered bodey of a male...

Nobody · Moderator

Hey, now! That's not true. I used to think much of the same, though.

Kori · Active Member

well Id feel even more misplaced lol But thats just My opinion as mY brother says Opianions are like Buts every one has them and they all stink

but i dont agree with that opinoin it stinks lol

Nobody · Moderator

Sora wrote:

=] My friend is also a lesbian in a man's body. She's soooooo awesome and rad; I love her.

What really ticks me off is when other people in the LGB community down transgenders, especially when they claim to be a gay man in a woman's body or visa versa. Uhg.

Oh! Speaking of which (A bit off topic,) have you ever read Venus Envy?

Yeah, they accept transgenders, but not lesbian transgenders. Lesbians especially don't believe that lesbian transgenders exist. I kinda prove that wrong, but whatever...

I have read Venus Envy, but I haven't read it in sometime.

Sora · Senior Member

Hmmm...Yeah, My Ex was one of the lesbians who don't like lesbian transgenders. =/ I don't get why. She's all like 'blah b;ah b;ah they steal our women' but seriously, how many women does one girl need, right? O-o;

Nobody · Moderator

They steal our women? Isn't that what men say about lesbians?

I know why they don't like us. It's because they think we're all perverts. They think our goal is just to experience lesbian sex and that's it. This couldn't be further from the truth. For me, my sexuality was more of an afterthought. I'm sure it's the same for all lesbian transgenders.

Let's say there are guys who call themselves transgender and are just out for lesbian sex. Would they be willing to go so far as to get a sex-change to just experience it? Answer: hell no. Guys value their manhood way too much. I honestly think there might be some guys out there who claim to be transgender just to get at lesbians, but don't whole us all into one group.

As a transgender, I don't put any value into my penis at all. To me, it's my greatest enemy and obstacle and I treat it as such. I have no love for it and I can't wait for when it's gone.

Sora · Senior Member

=D Amen to that! I can't imagine being born male, it'd be pure hell to me. I can't even picture how horrible it must be for you.

Kori · Active Member

for me my penis seems more like a wierd atachment thats notsoposed to be there, like an after thaught from someones mind when ever i look at it it just doesnt seem to fit...

HexElf2 · Lurker

Hi there, new member here so I'll do my best not to cause a fuss. I just wanted to commend you, miss Nobody, for not letting the beliefs of others wear you down. Usually I'm pretty devoted to working against all forms of religion but in this case I think it's cool to see someone standing on the same side of the fence (so to speak) as I am. So yeah you're a religious but you seem serious about going through with taking the last few steps towards completing your womanhood and I just had come here and show my respect for that, your story made me re-evaluate my views at least a little.

Beliefs aside, I couldn't help but notice the Naruto avatar there and I just had to share my view here, so please bear with me. That character, in and off itself, I think is a great symbol for people like ourselves. I mean sure it would be like a dream to just snap your fingers and take the form of a pretty female version of yourself but not only that, I couldn't help but notice what that transformation tells us about how appearances are completely superficial. After all, Naruto there will still be the same person even in this guise, and I believe that you will be too, miss Nobody, because you're simply lacking the physical aspects to match those of your soul right?

I hope I didn't sound like I was trying to belittle the physical aspects of things. Being trapped in a male body can feel like constantly walking around with shoes two sizes to small or wearing an incredibly uncomfortable bodysuit that is impossible to take off. What I mean is that as much of an impact "transforming" will have on your physical attributes, not to mention the relief it will provide for the mind, you're still going to be the same person right? I hope your parents realize this because your appearance shouldn't matter any more to them than the color of your shirt.

I hope at least some of that was of any help to you, miss Nobody. You're not weird at all ^_^

As for me, hi everyone I'm HexElf, you may or may not have heard about me before (depending on which fanfic sites you go to haha) and I have been following this comic for quite some time. I never even noticed the forum here until the other day but it seems rather nice.

Nobody · Moderator

Thank you for your support, Elfy. Yes, some people don't understand how I can be religious and yet a transgender. As many people don't understand how religious people can believe in evolution. They appear to be separate, so people make them out to be enemies. Some even go as far as to say that you can only have one or the other, not both. That's incorrect and a fallacy.

I'm too open-minded to limit myself just because some person tells me to.

HexElf2 · Lurker

Well it usually is very difficult to combine religion with any sciene really since one often excludes the other almost by default. Then again it would only be impossible to do so in a world that is made up entirely of black and white, which clearly isn't the case here. Again I am glad that you, miss Nobody, were able to combine the two despite your position.

Personally I did not have religion to rely on, but then again I would probably never allow it to aid me even if my life depended on it, but rather I had some real good friend to lean on when things got tough. It was difficult telling my parents but at least they respect my "condition" and said that it would be up to me whether I wanted to live my life as a woman or not. The only problem I have is making up my own mind about it. Having good male rolemodels makes the "outfit" easier to carry but looking at characters like a certain Randou and that girl Naruto avatar makes it so damn tempting to reject them again.

Ah well this is almost turning into a rant on my own experiences, all I meant to say was really that I personally have a lot of experience in the field and that I am willing to offer support should you need it, miss Nobody, and if not I wish you luck on dispelling that unwanted Henge no Jutsu of yours -_^

Gothic_Pheonix · Lurker

Yes, I'm curently reading Venus Envy! I love that comic.

Sora · Senior Member

Gothic_Pheonix wrote:

Yes, I'm curently reading Venus Envy! I love that comic.

I'm thinking the artist quit on the comic. SHe hasn't updated in a while and when she did, it was about transgender awareness. Though, I must admit, that was pretty dramatic. ;-;

Sakura · Lurker

Yeah... I'm not sure what's up with Erin... she hasn't seemed to do anything for the comic (other than the TDoR update) in forever... Not even a news post explaining WHY she hasn't done anything.

Nobody · Moderator

She's been doing Venus Envy for a while, so give her a break. It's possible that she is doing other things and exploring new ideas.

Sakura · Lurker

Oh, I fully understand she might have other things going on that are preventing her from working on the comic. I'm cool with that. I just think when you do something like a webcomic, you should at least let your audience know what's going on, and give them a rough idea of when things might get back to normal. I mean, she had time to draw and post the TDoR strip... she couldn't take five minutes to write a short news post about why the comic's been dead for so long?

Dtor · Lurker

DAMN.

I'd like to say that what you're going through must be really tough, and I respect you for enduring all that load of **** from other people. You can do it!

darkside · Senior Member

i dont think i have written on this yet so sorry nobody
but yeah what i think your doing is really courages and awesome i mean its like you have found a peice of you that has been missing i think thats how everyone feels when they find out something out about themselves and isnt afride of experssing this (p.s. this is my opion plz dont get mad of offended anyone at the matter) but i really kinda wanna know how you are doing in this progress if thats not to personal or pruying

you have way more cougrage then i ever would rock on nobody

LadyTwilight · Senior Member

Whoaaaa~ Hihii! My intro page will have to wait, I gotta respond here first. So, firstly, I'd like to say that I, too, am just as much an uncommon-ity as you, and it's really a good feeling to see that there's other people in the same boat--or at least in the same lake.
I'm very glad that you have a belief that supports you, especially when you need it most~ A source of strength like that is often needed for people, period, but drastically more so for people in positions as ours (I personally lucked out here--90% of my friends I've told are still just that, and about every person in my family--especially my mom--has offered continuous support).

I can't even imagine the anxiety you're going through about your parents. My mom was signifigantly lower-risk to approach and I still got sick over it. If you feel you can't wait until you move out, my advice to offer (ha...slight irony...I'm a couple months short of 18) to you is this:
1.) Set up a contingency plan with a friend/someone you know, somewhere you can live for X period of time;
2.) Set up a time to tell them that offers them time to think about it, I set mine up for when my mom stopped home before leaving for the weekend. I've heard written out letters are a good idea;
3.) Don't do it alone. If you do in person, have one, two, four, ten, twenty friends with you that you trust.
--.) The calmer you are/you appear/your friends appear, miiiight probably increase the chance of them reacting calmer. But this is mere conjecture, it just seems like it'd make sense. If they're calm, then offer to answer any questions they might have.
--.) Time. Give them time, even if they take it badly at first, they believe they've known the...'other you' for 22 years.

Of course, if you're confident they'll go elephant-in-a-china-shop ballistic, then maybe you should just wait 'till you're on your own like you said. ^ ^;;

Well, I hope we talk more laters! Baibai! *ran out of time to write post*

Nobody · Moderator

To everyone giving your support, thanks a lot. I, quite honestly, don't what to say to everyone. I honestly don't think I'm brave or anything. I'm just a girl, that's all.

Lady, I've already thought up a lot of different plans to come out. It's really just...so complicated... Thanks for your suggestions, though.

LadyTwilight · Senior Member

Nobody wrote:
Lady, I've already thought up a lot of different plans to come out. It's really just...so complicated... Thanks for your suggestions, though.

I can't do much over the interwebs, and I'm glad I could help a little, too bad it couldn't come with a supplimentary hug....those are expensive, and generally better to obtain locally.

If it weren't complicated.... well, I suppose you wouldn't be in such a tough situation....But...I think we just get born with our own little (or generous, or large, or titanic) surplus of 'complicated'....it's not really fair. If wishes were fishes, as they say....

-|2nd part|-

Nobody wrote:
To everyone giving your support, thanks a lot. I, quite honestly, don't what to say to everyone. I honestly don't think I'm brave or anything. I'm just a girl, that's all.

That you can say that, believe it, and put yourself on the line to be who and what you are...That takes a lot of bravery.
It takes...far more than it should, that's certain. But that doesn't diminish that it takes courage. Sometimes it's hard for a person to even admit it to their own self. Sometimes it takes more courage than a person has or has access to...

Ack. That got kinda long. I just meant that even to just say that in this situation means you already have plenty of courage. They're six (or eight) heavy words, and you have a beautiful strength.

I'm not very religious, so it might not mean much, but you have my prayers; and I'm sure you have friends, denizens of this board included, that will help you back up if you stumble or trip.

As another someone I know said "It may take a while [to start and finish], but it's not as long as the rest of my life."

-- Edited by LadyTwilight at 12:42, 2008-01-15

Nobody · Moderator

I never really thought that calling myself a girl would make me a hero or something. I honestly still don't think of myself like that...

LadyTwilight · Senior Member

So Nobody, a question, how did/does your liking girls factor into the whole thing for you? Has it been a relatively minor focus throughout? Was it big at one point but now is just 'yeah, so'? Did it affect the process of coming out to friends or yourself?

Nobody · Moderator

It did. For a long time I though, "If I become a girl, that means that I'll have to date guys and I don't like them." It didn't occur to me that I could still date girls. I'm an idiot like that.

Serafer · Lurker

:) No you aren't weird at all. I have met people like you and trust me, you are far from being weird. I understand that it takes a long time to actually accept the facts but eventually, it will become all clear.

I wish you best of luck! Follow your heart! And remember, it's never too late! :D

Myotis · Lurker

You have chosen a admirable choice, though I can see it will be difficult to deal with. I believe what you are doing is something I call the natural flow...that is, taking action to do and change what feels right to you. Due to this, I find you to be a highly respectable person. As for the concept on religious natures; I'm very glad you were able to find your own salvation. Lately most others seem to believe that God is a hateful being that punishes on whim...I see God to be a being of endless compassion that loves all things. Which of course, you helped to prove, clearly. I sincerely hope all goes well for you.

Elpis · Active Member

My introduction is going to have to wait

I never thought I would find some one else like me. Nobody, your my hero if I hadn't seen this i would never have told any one here.

I'm in the some boat as you. I was in denial and really depressed all trough highschool. I've just started telling my really close friends that im a transsexual and that i want to transtion in to the girl i really am. I dont know how to tell my parents because im still liveing at home trough college.

Ive only told 10 people who actual know me in real life and one one of them had a bad reaction to me. she kept saying things like its just a phase and other things that shouldn't be repeated. It was really mean and it hurt a lot because she has been my friend since kindergarden.

I also like girls. i even have a girlfriend and she accepts me for who i am and will suport me through every thing.

Doc · Love Freak

Nobody is pretty strong I've delt with my share of confusion not really sure if I was a boy or girl either in fact I'm still not real sure. Even if I did make a discovery I doubt I'd have the strength to act on it. I mean the thought of being a girl has crossed my mind many times but it's hard to say at times it's felt genuine and other times I think I'm just confusing myself. either way if you meet me on the internet 9/10 times I'm a girl unless you really need to know otherwise.

abe · Active Member

@Doc: Is it possible that you are both? Is bi-gender a possibility? In any case, good luck at sorting things out.

@Elpis: It's great that you feel able to talk about things here, and that you have some supportive friends as well. Best wishes on the path you are following.

@Nobody: and belated best wishes to you as well.

I'm sure you've both done your own research; but just in case it should be helpful, the thread "Links to informative websites or research papers" on the Khaos forum contains some links that may be relevant, and some comments by the members on which links were useful.

Doc · Love Freak

Actually over the last few hours I've been experimenting with Elpis's help
trying on dresses, polishing my nails, shaving my legs,
I gotta say I could get addicted to this very easily
in fact I'm in class now with my nails done

i spent a good hour or two on my toes trying to get them looking pretty

I'll give it some time but for now I'm having alot of fun

Elpis · Active Member

You know you liked being my little girlhttp://www.sparkimg.com/emoticons/biggrin.gif

Doc · Love Freak

yes Mistress Sofia

Nobody · Moderator

Wow... It's been a while, huh? Well, I have a few updates in my life to share with you guys--if you don't mind. First of all, things didn't go well with Kitty. If you recall, we were dating and met on this site. It was about last year when she stopped coming online. I'm pretty sure she blocked me and I have no idea why. It didn't surprise me when a month later she sent me an email out of nowhere saying she didn't want to be my girlfriend anymore. She said she wanted to stay friends, but then kept me blocked on her IM's, so I'm pretty sure she didn't mean it. I have no idea what I did wrong. She gave me some lame excuses and blamed me for almost all the problems in her life that I couldn't have possibly caused. Myself, I saw it coming because she seemed to becoming more distant to me. I'm not sure if she found someone else and got interested in her or what. Anyway, it's been a year--or about that--and I'm over it now.

I do have a new girlfriend. She's a cute Japanese girl who lives in Canada. We're taking our time and we're not doing anything stupid. I usually have a tendency to rush into love and then fall on my face. I really don't want that to happen again because I really care about her.

Doc · Love Freak

Ahhh yes that is a good plan.. I have a tendency to do the same thing

Twiggy · Newbie

I'm transgender too and I also don't know how to my parents cause half my family has already rejected me because I'm gay, but for them to discover that I'm more of a guy trapped in a womans body would really mess things up...plus on top of that I have the joy of extra nipples *sweatdrop*

Doc · Love Freak

I see I see... Well Welcome to our little club

Xephyr · Newbie

hmm, i might as well jump in here as well... intersexed transgender here. my parents just picked the wrong gender to bring me up as >_<

everything has turned out well though... luckily, my family is pretty relaxed, and accepted me for what i am. well, they don't like my goth clothing, but meh :P